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These experiences, shared by people of all genders and backgrounds, demonstrate how the issues of sexual assault, harassment, and "slut" shaming affect our lives. Use this collection to expand your understanding and share it with those who need to know they're not alone.
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SHARE YOUR STORY

Throughout high school I truly believed I was a slut and therefore wasn’t worthy of love.

10/10/2019

 
I went to a small high school, and everyone knew everyone’s business. I was labeled “easy" the minute I started high school, because I had big boobs and I liked hanging out with guys. My reputation just went downhill from there when I lost my virginity halfway through freshman year. I had been dating the same boy for 5 months when we had sex, and once people at school found out I became the class slut. What was even worse was my boyfriend was CONGRATULATED for losing his virginity, while I was condemned. After that no one ever took me seriously. Guys would just grab my boobs, and if I got mad they would say things like "oh shut up" or "It's not like this is the first time some guy had felt you up". Guys would run up to me and try and pull my top down so my boobs would pop out. In the hallways sometimes they would smack my butt. Losing my virginity was my decision and no one else’s, and I was fine with my decision until people at school began bullying me.
I went on to hook up with other guys, which was also fine because it was MY decision to, and MY business, and it was what I wanted to do. However, no one at school could seem to wrap their heads around that. The people I went to school with all claimed to be very open-minded, but they are far from open-minded when it comes to women’s sexuality. I ended up losing one of my best guy friends because he told me if I went past 1st base with any guy he would stop talking to me. One night I was upset because a guy I was dating was being a jerk, and my guy friend told me "Well, if you stopped acting like a slut, you wouldn’t have these problems." I cried to him about feeling slutty because of what people said about me and he simply said, "Well, you are one."
Most girls at my school didn’t even kiss boys, which made me look even worse. It was hard for me to hang out with girls because I couldn’t talk to them about my life. I felt like they looked at me like one looks at an exotic animal at the zoo. I was so foreign to them and it made me feel isolated and alone. I had 3 friends there who understood me and I am so thankful for them. 
The worst part about my reputation though didn’t even occur at school, but at home. After a long day at school, I would come home and be called a slut by my own father. He told me a looked slutty when I straightened my hair, when I wore a tight shirt, when I wore eye shadow, etc. When he found out I lost my virginity (which I know is no easy thing for a father to find out about his little girl) he called me a whore. A week couldn’t go by without him putting me down using words like "slut", "whore", and "harlot". 
When I was in high school, just like every other teenager, I just wanted to be accepted. Sometimes I would do things I wasn’t fully comfortable with because I thought it would help a guy love me. My reputation certainly didn’t help me in the relationship department. So many guys didn’t want an actual relationship with me because they thought I was easy. One time, a friend of a guy I was seeing actually came up to me and asked if they could share me. I have never been so disgusted, or felt so disgusting in my life.
Looking back, the thing that upsets me the most is how I never stood up for myself, because I ACTUALLY BELIEVED EVERYONE. I heard what they said day in and day out and began taking it as truth. Throughout high school I truly believed I was a slut and therefore wasn’t worthy of love. That is the worst thing you can do. My advice to anyone in a situation like mine is to please please please please please do not believe what others are saying about you. You are not a slut. You can make your own decisions, and as along as you are fine with those decisions that is all that matters. Do not let others define you, because more often than not they will only point out the negatives and you are worth so much more than that. People are going to judge you constantly for your decisions, but just remember that it's YOUR BUSINESS and NOT THEIRS. Being curvy doesn’t make you a slut. Wearing whatever clothes you like doesn’t make you a slut. Wearing makeup doesn’t make you a slut. Hooking up with people doesn’t make you a slut. 
Most of all remember that high school doesn’t last forever. One day you will grow up and leave these people behind, and people will not care so much about your personal life. I have since graduated and now attend hair school, where I am surrounded by loving, open-minded, and accepting people who have shown me that everyone I went to high school with was wrong. Just like the people bringing you down are wrong.

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