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These experiences, shared by people of all genders and backgrounds, demonstrate how the issues of sexual assault, harassment, and "slut" shaming affect our lives. Use this collection to expand your understanding and share it with those who need to know they're not alone.
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No survivor should ever be made to feel crazy by law enforcement when she comes in and reports her assault.

10/10/2019

 
I was raped at 17. I had never heard of anyone being raped the way I was, being forced to preform oral sex (which, at the time, was only considered sexual assault, until the FBI changed the definition of rape the year after my rape). It wasn't nearly as violent as some stories of survivors that I've heard. It took me almost 4 months to realize it. Because I didn't realize it, it took me 3 1/2 years to report my rape (I reported it November 1, 2013). Originally it was because I had no evidence, and I wasn't going to have my name be dragged through the mud because "I regretted a decision I made." I didn't HAVE a decision. I was forced. Once I came to terms with that, more time had passed, and I knew nothing would come of it, and I didn't want to go through the stress of a police report, so instead I got help through counseling. Then, this year, I was talking to my current therapist about possibly reporting it, if it would be worth it. I moved to a place where I no longer care if I ever see justice for what he did to me. I just want him to be on someone's radar. The chances of him doing this to me and never doing it again are slim. I want to be able to help someone else, God forbid he does it to someone else. So, I went in, by myself, and filed a report. I was made to feel as though I was lying, because certain details after 3 1/2 years are fuzzy. Because he didn't have a weapon, because he didn't openly threaten me. Because I waited. I had different people say things to me that hurt me, before I went in to report it. My friend telling me that, to him, it didn't sound like a rape, just a horny teenage boy. A friend's grandmother telling me that I needed to report because, what if he did this to someone else? As if I was responsible for anyone he raped after he raped me. I never got to speak to a detective. I didn't even get to speak to a woman. I was alone in a room with two male uniformed officers who asked the same questions over and over to find some inconsistency in my story, so they would have one less case to worry about. It wasn't until I told them for about the fifth time that I knew nothing was probably going to come of my report and I was okay with that, I just needed him to be on someone's radar that they treated me like anything actually happened and started to show a little compassion. No survivor should ever be made to feel crazy by law enforcement when she comes in and reports her assault. No survivor should be made to feel like allegations are simply coming from regret. While slut shaming needs to be stopped throughout society, it MUST be stopped in law enforcement.

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