The UnSlut Project
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These experiences, shared by people of all genders and backgrounds, demonstrate how the issues of sexual assault, harassment, and "slut" shaming affect our lives. Use this collection to expand your understanding and share it with those who need to know they're not alone.
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SHARE YOUR STORY

I was called slut & “cave woman” since the guy who pulled me across the tracks by my hair said, “Just like a cave woman.”

10/10/2019

 
I just want to thank you for what you are doing. I am 53 & when I was in 7th grade & 12 years old, I was dragged across the tracks by my hair by a boy I liked. There were 3 of them & I was forced to give them oral sex. I still played with Barbie dolls, didn’t know guys had penises, let alone that sexual act. We lived in a small town & by Monday in school it had spread like wildfire, with the omission of it being a forced act. I, like you, lost life-long friends, nobody talked to me & I was called slut, whore, BJ giver, the whole gamut of these names  & “cave woman” since the guy who pulled me across the tracks by my hair said, “Just like a cave woman.” In a funny way, some kids thought that nickname came from my looks because I had frizzy hair back then.  Unlike you, it stuck all through high school, so for 5 years I endured hell & torture. No friends, no dance or prom dates, no involvement in extra curricular activities. I cut school a lot & when I was there I was stoned on pot most of the time. I always wondered how my life would have been different if I had a chance at school and giving it my 100%. Despite all the cutting of classes & lack of attention while I was there I still graduated w/a “C” average & 2 years in a row won awards over all South Jersey in the DECA program I was in. My Jr. years I won 2nd place for display & my Sr. year I won honorable mention for advertising.  But after graduation I was just glad to be out of there & spent the next decade being a junkie, no college, no hopes of a career. I, like you & Audrie, never told my parents about what happened. I carried the shame, thinking it was my fault since a couple weeks before I had had my first ever make out session w/the boy I liked. The one thing I  would want bullies to know, especially when it comes to sexual assaults, for me, like you, I endured  it  from the time I got on the bus in the morning, all day at school & on the bus ride home. I couldn’t even walk down the street w/out being harassed. And every time I was called a name, or bullied, I lived the attack over again. So for me, it was like 5 years of the movie Groundhog Day. 41 years later & I still cry, like now, tears are streaming down my face. I have talked w/my classmates on FaceBook, etc., & some don’t remember the torture I endured by them. Their lives went on, but for me, it’s burned into my soul. I can truthfully say, what they did to me has impacted all my relationships, w/ guys as well as making & trusting people as friends. I can’t even imagine what it would have been like if social media was available like it is today. – Patti Marshall

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  • HOME
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