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These experiences are shared by people of all genders and backgrounds from all over the world. They demonstrate how the issues of sexual assault, harassment, and "slut" shaming affect many of our lives in deep, often dangerous ways. Use this collection to expand your understanding and share it with those who could benefit or gain insight from it.
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He turned some of my friends as well as his friends against me and they all spread rumors about me being a slut.

10/10/2019

 
In eighth grade I had my first boyfriend. A week after we started dating, he tried to get me to kiss him but I didn't want to so I said no. That was a Friday. On Monday, I was waiting for my mother to pick me up from school and he pinned me against the wall underneath the stairs. He said he wouldn't let me go until I kissed him. I refused. A bunch of people walked past us at different times but they just gave us looks or laughed or spurred him on. Nobody thought to help me. I kept telling him no but he wouldn't listen. So he forced his lips onto mine and I froze because I was so frightened. Then he let go of me and smiled like he was happy and proud of himself. He said bye and left me there under the stairs, shocked and scared. I went back to the lobby and the secretary asked me if I was okay because apparently one of the parents saw me and mentioned it but nobody bothered to actually come and see what was going on. I didn't want to seem weak, so I told her I was fine and went outside to wait for my mother. To anyone who reads this, doing nothing does NOT make you weak. I was afraid and shocked, but I was not weak. Then freshman year I started dating a boy who was a junior. I was 14 and he was 17. Five months after we started dating, which was two months after I turned 15 years old, he asked me to have sex with him. I told him I didn't want to, and he said it was fine, but his entire demeanor toward me became mean. So I gave up, because by then I was a self-harmer for a long time and my body didn't mean much to me, and I was afraid that he might hurt me. We dated for six months after that, and in that time I had sex with him many times only because I was afraid he would leave me and I couldn't stand being alone because I already felt so abandoned (I had moved recently due to the death of my mother and lost all my old friends due to the move), and I was afraid that he might actually hurt me because he was short-tempered and often made me feel threatened. One week before our 1 year anniversary he dumped me through text saying he no longer loved me. Then he started telling all his friends I was a slut and a whore, and they all believed him and agreed. It really hurt because some of them were friends with me before that happened and some of them were even my friends first. So he turned some of my friends as well as his friends against me and they all spread rumors about me being a slut. I started self-harming again, dangerously bad because I had such a low sense of self-worth. They made me believe I was even more worthless than I already thought. When I started dating another boy seven months later, I felt like I was keeping a dirty little secret and actually felt the need to APOLOGIZE to him about my previous relationship because I felt so dirty and used. That relationship didn't last, neither did the next. I am currently single because I've realized that I'm not ready to be in a relationship after everything that has happened to me. It's been 20 months since he started those rumors about me, and even though people haven't gossiped about me in the halls for long over a year, thoughts of him still haunt me. But I have to be strong, because I have a younger sister who looks up to me and I have to be strong for her. If you think really hard, you'll realize that you have someone to be strong for, too. We all do. So stay strong and don't let someone make you feel weak or inferior or scared. Your body belongs to you and no one has the right to touch it without your permission. - Anastasia

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  • HOME
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