The UnSlut Project
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These experiences, shared by people of all genders and backgrounds, demonstrate how the issues of sexual assault, harassment, and "slut" shaming affect our lives. Use this collection to expand your understanding and share it with those who need to know they're not alone.
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SHARE YOUR STORY

It didn't stop until I left the school.

10/21/2019

 
Sexual bullying and slut shaming can happen to anyone. During the middle of my college/university experience a little over twenty years ago, I somehow caught the attention of a sorority girl in one of my classes at a small private college. I was still socially awkward at that time, and her rather energetic nature and interest made me a little nervous. I blurted out, "Don't have an orgasm, now!" after a nerve-wracking conversation one day, which I realize now was totally inappropriate. But I was totally unprepared for the onslaught of revenge from her sorority sisters. I was sexually harassed repeatedly by e-mail, telephone, and even in person. This continued even when the campus police got involved. It didn't stop until I left the school. Thankfully, that experience didn't follow me to university, but, I remember walking across the street when a convertible pulled up and a young woman leaned out and said, "Yeah, baby. Shake it!" For some reason, that triggered memories of being mercilessly teased in middle school by boys that thought I wiggled my buttocks too much when I walked. Even though I doubt her comment was homophobic like theirs were, I still felt like an objectified piece of meat. I know that men in our society are encouraged to welcome sexual attention. Yet how can it be welcomed when it's unwanted and degrading? I think most guys know the difference, and no amount of swagger (or retaliatory insult) covers up the hurt. It's not cool, and it's not "studly". It's abusive. A quick thanks to my friends at the No More Shame Project/Trauma Recovery University, who've given me courage to heal from childhood abuse, including sexual abuse. Survivors can be vulnerable to this sort of bullying. Please use my real name; I've come far enough that I don't need to be ashamed anymore. - Jonathan Pratt

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  • HOME
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  • SHARE YOUR STORY
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  • RESOURCES